across your picture on the internet and immediately fell in
love. I know that might sound crazy. But I do believe in
love at first.
said, would you go out with an older guy? I was actually
born in 1982. But until recently I stopped growing sometime
around 1989. I do intend to bulk up soon though.
I've enclosed a picture of me, next to my owner's shoes. I
currently weigh about 60 pounds. I don't mind bigger women.
In fact, I find it very attractive!
write me back. I look forward to hearing from you.
you certainly know how to make a girl blush! Your letter comes
as a shock to me, and you take a wonderful photograph.... For
all my twenty-one years, I've remained chaste (and I'm sure you
know how easy it is for a sedentary sphere of my size to remain
so!). So let me choose my words carefully: I am touched by your
straightforwardness and look forward to corresponding with you.
You are also welcome to become my Facebook Friend!
Search for my profile at
COULD YOU GIVE ME YOUR VIEWPOINT ON THE INCONSISTENT TRIAD?
IS IT A NECESSARY PHILOSOPHICAL TOOL TO DISCOVERY AND IS IT
REALLY NECESSARY TO COVER IT IN AN INTRODUCTORY COLLEGE
COURSE IN PHILOSOPHY? COULD YOU GIVE ME SOME INSIGHT?
YOUR BIGGEST FAN--RW
To remind you, readers, an inconsistent
triad consists of three propositions
of which at most two can be true. Now, ArDubya, to answer
your question: An inconsistent triad is indeed a vital
philosophical tool. It is therefore a necessary term and
entirely appropriate to be addressed in Introduction to
Philosophy. Finally, three monkeys typing for thee weeks in
a room may make the top Oddball story on Keith Olbermann. So
long for now, R.W., and thanks for all the fish!
MURRAY: DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE LOST CITY OF ATLANTIS?
WAS IT A REAL PLACE--OR--IS IT WHERE MANKIND RETREATS MENTALLY
TO RECHARGE OURSELVES. LEGEND SAYS MY ANCESTORS CAME FROM THERE.
COULD YOU GIVE ME SOME INSIGHT PLEASE? THANK YOU!!!!!!
"WAY DOWN BELOW THE OCEAN--
THAT'S WHERE I WANT TO BE--
HE MAY BE;
Dear “Hail”: I know enough about Atlantis to
attempt an answer. Atlantis existed and continues to exist;
most of humankind, regrettably, has stopped believing in its
existence, which makes it very difficult for you to find it
these days. Tectonic shiftings between your ears move plates
amid volcanic eruptions, causing now an Atlantis, now an
Asgard, now a Valhalla, to sink below your sight. Silly
Rabbit, every place you go is real, whether you are really
“there” or not! And if, indeed, your ancestors are from
Atlantis, would you ask them if they can get me Aquaman’s
Your pal, Murray
Murray: Would you know what the air-speed velocity of an
African hummingbird might be? Could you give me some
insight? -- RW
The Simple Answer to your question is: High enough to remain
a testimony to the eternal avian miracle -- the poetry of
flight. Hummingbirds delight in their rare capacity to not
simply fly but also to hover while in flight -- a truly
wondrous paradox! It is a shame that humans have yet to
master such a feat and yet unknowingly possess the ability
to do the same. It is the act of Being Still that escapes
humanity's grasp. By the way, Mr. L was flabbergastedly
overjoyed to read your letter after thirty years of flight.
He hopes you fly, he hopes you hover, he hopes you are Being
Still and is happy you're Still Being.
Your Pal, Murray
I write for a text book company. Can you tell me what
students and teachers like best, and dislike the most, about
their school text books?
Thanks, and keep up the silver sheen.
2 Penn Plaza, 21st Floor New York, New York 10121
Thanks for writing! Wow! Word sure gets around fast! I’ll
post your letter and see if anyone out there will share
Hello Murray, Mr. Villanueva here.
I am working on a painting in 015 and I can't seem to finish
it. The painting is about my struggles to figure out
the math that would help me determine the numerical alias
for my inner llama. The only part that is incomplete
is the section marked "inner compartment". My question
is, What would the inner compartment include? Do you
need to see the painting? It’s quite large. It’s
an old table. Thank you in advance for your wise
The numerical alias for your inner llama may
be arrived at by considering this question:
Is it the whimsy of your precision you wish
to compartmentalize ((W)p+[IC]=IL), or the
precision of your whimsy ((P)w=IL-[IC])? Do
the walls of your compartment stop at your
ears, or do they reach beyond your sight?
Quoting that old song from the 40’s by Bix
Biederbeck, “Wherever you go, there you
are.” So be there, Mr. V! Regressing
concentric shapes – either on a flat
surface, or in three dimensions – are a
place to start. Choosing if the shapes
converge will go a little further for you to
find your answer. In other words, does your
llama travel timeless trails, or does it
stand silent yet sentient inside a zoo?
Thank you, and thanks to all artists, by the
way, for your art!
Murray, long time, no see! I hope the
brisk climate of Room 106 is treating you well. Mr. L
is inevitably keeping you well adorned with beads and such.
I have several questions for you, Ms.
1. Can a hearse carrying a corpse
drive in the car-pool lane?
2. Why doesn't broccoli come in a can?
3. When the French swear do they say
pardon my English?
That should give you some food for thought.
Enjoy -- AB
1. When, indeed, do people stop being
persons and become cargo? A hearse carrying
a corpse CAN use the carpool lane, but
should it? A police officer spies a hearse
in a car-pool lane with no visible
passengers. The officer will still have to
pull the hearse over, investigate, etc. Not
only does this pose an impediment to the
flow of traffic, it also diverts the police
officer from his/her job of keeping us safe.
2. The charm of broccoli, I’m told, is its
texture. Canned broccoli would be limp,
droopy, and tasteless. Broccoli is one of
those vegetables that can only be preserved
3. I’m sure French-speaking people excuse
their verbal faux pas as graciously as does
And, yes, my home in Room 106 is
delightfully cool and invigorating! Several
students are keeping sweaters and blankets
stored on the shelves to stay warm for
class. Some complain, some appreciate a
cooler classroom, but all of Mr. L’s
students are working hard and doing good
work, so it must be working!
Before answering last week’s letters, I am so happy to
thank Mr. Rich Ruggiero for single-handedly creating and
managing this space for me. Rich is a very busy guy around
Vernon Schools. With all he has to do, I know how precious
his time must be, and I’m deeply grateful for his energy,
creative talents, and his enthusiasm.
Darling Murray ....
When I was a naive, sweet
child back in the early 70’s, I was
subjected to a lot of teasing by two young
men in my CWP (Current World Problems) class
at my high school. One was dressed as a
German soldier and the other one claimed to
be related to me. How can I let them know
that despite their relentless and cruel
treatment I turned out quite well??
A Joisey gal in Virginia
Dear Joisey Gal,
The fact that you are able today to regard
yourself positively is testament to your
strong character, to your perseverance in
overcoming your memory of cruelties from
your high school years. Do note that I wrote
“overcoming.” You still have a way to go
before coming to terms with your memories.
“Dressed in a German uniform?” What sort of
high school did you attend? Regardless, most
young people walk a social tightrope through
the hallways of high school: they want to be
different, but they are afraid lest they be
branded weird. I’ll bet if you met these two
fellows today they would remember -- and
would be mortified -- how they picked on
you. I’ll bet they feel sorry for what they
did. As adults, they hopefully will realize
what they did was wrong. There is a place
where kidding around with friends becomes
teasing. Some find that place sooner than
But to your question: How can you let them
know? Contact your high school class reunion
committee or your high school. Visit sites
such as Classmates.com. Try a Google search.
If, as you write, one is related to you,
then contact relatives. If you find them,
write them a “hi-how-are-you?” Was it
Shakespeare who wrote: “Revenge is a dish
best served cold”? Enclose a photo of
yourself in your favorite outfit and your
best smile. Have you ever heard the saying
“Living well is the best revenge”? Live
well, Joisey Gal!
Murray, I just wanted to say thank you for
keeping your eye on my friend, Mr. L. I was
fortunate enough to be a college classmate
with Mr. L from decades ago, and I am glad
he is doing so fine. I have shared some
Murray beads with about 20 first graders who
know the story of Murray !
Mr. L remembers you as an always-sweet and
upbeat young lady, part of a close,
eccentric, and electric circle of friends
from his days at McKendree College. He’s not
surprised you’re teaching, as it appeared
even back then that you were born to it. I
don’t get around much, so I hope some day
you’ll travel from Missouri and visit me in
Dear Murray :
I have your picture on my refrigerator
because you remind me every day that there
are still some good human beings on this
earth. Thanks for your years of
conservation wisdom, and we all look forward
to many more years of expanded
counsel. Congratulations on your latest
Dear Linda, I’ve never really thought of
myself as a human being, but I appreciate
your compliment. The lesson is that good
human beings are everywhere. Most are hard
to find, because they usually keep their
good deeds quiet. I’m glad you’re listening.
Thank you for your kind words! I think it’s
COOL to be on your fridge!